Happy 4th of July everyone! What a great day, the day our country was born and coincidentally, my son. Every year, I reminisce with him about the day he was born, what occurred each hour of that day (my water broke around midnight, so I really do have "birthing" memories for the whole day). I joke with him that he can't have any presents until the exact time he was born (5:15pm for those of you who are interested), that he was the firecracker I saw that night.Over the years, I've also often quietly reflected on what my life has become, what it might have been if he were not here. In the early days, I did yearn for my old life, that life of little responsibility, of being able to go on archaeology digs, of not having to worry about my choices affecting another person's life. Oh sure, I was married for some time before I had J, but it is a different responsibility, the responsibility of a parent to a child than it is of a spouse to a spouse. I would think of all the trips I could have been taking, of the wild adventures I could have had.
Now, I don't think of those so much. I think of what J will do with his life. I appreciate his honesty and love towards us, his family. I think of the near future when he will not be around as much, focusing on his own independent life. Funny, that carefree life ahead does not look as appealing as it did 13 years ago.